About Judi
I am the mother of 6 sons and grandmother of 4 girls and 2 boys. I was married to the man of my dreams and the love of my life, my best friend for almost 34 years until he left us very suddenly and unexpectedly.
I have been a widow since January 4, 2008. On that day I thought for sure my life had ended forever. This has been the longest, darkest journey I have ever encountered.
Dean and I were married on January 28, 1974 in Chula Vista, California. Our meeting started out as a blind date. After a brief romance, one night as we returned home from a date, he handed me a small box and when I opened it there was an engagement ring inside. I looked up at him but he said nothing. I asked him if this meant he wanted to marry me and he quietly and with a smile said, “Yes”. He was stationed there in the Navy at the time. Dean was born in Sioux City, Iowa and I was from New Orleans. Shortly after we were married we came back to Louisiana so I could stay with my family when he was sent overseas for 3 months. I remember so well how I felt when I said goodbye to him and left him at the airport then, 34 years ago - I thought the tears would never end. But when his ship came back he rushed back home to me and we began our life together.
This time when he left me, it is forever…he’s never coming back. As I try to write this now my heart is breaking all over again as I realize the finality of it all and the tears once again begin to flow. How does anyone get over such a loss? I can’t give you the answer to that question yet because I haven’t arrived at the end of my journey yet. I’m still missing him, I still love him with all of my heart and I’m still grieving his loss so very much.
I have been keeping a journal since that cold and dark day in January when his sudden and unexpected death took him away from me without any warning. In doing so, I’m trying to remember where I was then, where I am now and where I will be when I can finally accept this loss.
Please feel free to join me as I travel a road I wasn’t planning on having to endure anytime in the near future but I’ve learned that death has a timetable all its own. Is there life after death here on earth after such a devastating loss? We shall find out…
